Female Led Manners

Submissive Male Deportment

This lesson is about the manners and behaviors of a male. We cover some very important areas here on how a male will communicate with his Mistress/Owner. The day-to-day tempo is very important for the comfort and well being of everyone involved in this relationship. It may seem irrational at times because you are not permitted to speak out of turn, however, you will soon learn the importance of being allowed to speak. You are given more thought to the words you say and with this thought many things change. You need to consider the nature of your Mistress/Owner. She is unlike any other woman you’ve encountered before. If she wanted to be around the typical and average male she wouldn’t be wasting her time with you.

I thoroughly enjoy a well-behaved male. Arrogance and a smart ass turn off most dominant women. Some women might like a smart ass because it stimulates her dominant passions, however I can’t imagine she’ll allow this to go on a day-to-day basis. If you are a smart ass, the chances of you finding a daily relationship might be few. You might become a playmate yet not permitted to be a live-in. It is not up to you to decide. Every woman has her own rules. What I am outlining here are my expectations when it comes to a male.

The males I have trained are well accepted by dominant women so I feel that my training is very effective, still, be sure to sit down and discuss it with your Mistress/Owner. I prefer to be addressed as “Ma’am” or “Goddess”. Never reply with a “Yep”, “OK”, or any other word you would use around a buddy. Your Goddess is not your buddy but one who should be respected at all times. You must never lose sight of this. Always acknowledge her with a yes or no “Ma’am’! And always be enthusiastic. A bad attitude will get you nothing but a finger pointing towards the door.

The attitude of a male is VERY important. I cannot stress this enough. To serve a woman means serving her emotional needs and a good attitude will do this. Never talk back. No matter what. Because she is such a creative and complex being, you must be willing to accept all aspects of her personality. Remember that you serve her in ALL ways so if she wants to snap at you or make a derogatory statement, you should not answer with an excuse or try to defend yourself. You should simply say “Yes, ma’am.” If she told you to jump six feet into the air you should not laugh and say “Goddess I can not do that.” You should first try, try, try no matter how foolish it looks. When you have tired and realized that you cannot do what she asks, you must beg forgiveness. Do you understand how this could apply to almost anything? She may be serious as a heart attack or in a playful mood purposely yanking your chain. Your smart-ass remarks and excuses will only piss her off. Trust me on this.

You should never ask her for sexual favors of any kind. Don’t ever make sexual remarks or innuendos. This is totally disrespectful. She will set the tempo and let you know what she wants and needs. If you have expectations and preconceptions, you need to reevaluate your desire to be involved in female supremacy. You must put a cap on your ego and any idea of being in control of this relationship. She will study you and know what’s best for you. You learn to trust in this and not challenge or read into it. The best time to have conversation and discuss concerns is while she is relaxing. You should already be performing some type of daily adoration such as a relaxing foot rub. Ask her if she’d like a foot rub. If you know how to do it right, she’ll never refuse unless she’s busy. Learn how to do it right. Once she is relaxed ask for permission to speak. She will give it or ask you to speak to her later. It is best not to force a discussion with her when she’s not in the mood. If you feel that you really need to talk to her about something it’s best to write a note and give it to her. Be sure to make reference to its urgency.

Example: “Goddess when you have a few moments I would like to speak to you about a personal matter.”

Or “Goddess when you have some time I would like to discuss some things about the house.”

Or “Goddess it is imperative that I speak to you as soon as possible about a private personal matter.”

If you say it’s urgent it better be urgent!

Each woman has her own way of communicating with a male. I like to talk to them in the morning when they bring me my coffee. My coffee is brought to me and I get a foot rub while I drink my first cup. This is the best time to speak to me. I’ll ask you about the weather and how things are around the house. I will also explain what I need done that day. This is a good time to talk to me. My days are full and very busy. I normally won’t feel like talking at the end of a stressful day. I try to set aside at least one night a week where my male and I sit down to eat and talk without interruption. Communication is very important, however you must remember your place and never lose sight of this. The energy of a male is very important. There is certain behavior that will surely get and keep her attention. Here are a few examples.

Entering a room: Never go barging into a room. Your male energy is intrusive when it breaks her woman space so suddenly. Do not knock on the door. Simply stand in the entrance and wait for her to acknowledge you. If she does not and looks busy you should not bother her. Unless it is urgent, go away and come back later. This is especially important when she has other lady friends or guests present.

Approaching or being called: If she doesn’t have one already you should supply your lady with a servants bell. I hate nothing more then to have to scream for a male. The sound of a bell will carry and be heard much further. It’s up to you to make sure she has this bell close at hand. You can buy lots of bells, however it’s just as simple to locate her, check on where she is and make sure the bell is sitting close at hand. You should make her needs part of your moment-to-moment consciousness. After all this is your purpose in life. When you are called you should waste no time getting to her. You should walk to the doorway and stop. She will tell you to come in and you will kneel next to her.

There are signals each Goddess will have to change your attitude or position. Everyone is different. These signals may be used in public for subtle and private communication. Here are some that I use:

One snap of my finger: Kneel instantly and I do mean he better drop!

Two snaps: Kneel and kiss my foot

One clap of my hands: I want him to remove his clothes… everything!

When I say “male’s name” go check on my dogs.” It means that I want him to leave the room. Or I may have another phrase like:
“Why don’t you go see what the weather will be like next week.”

Then if we are in public and I feel he is getting out of line I might say, “I have always dreamed of going to Alaska.” He knows that if I say this out of the blue his ass will be grass when we get home!

I have other signs and signals I use for different circumstances. Not all males need these and some need to be clobbered on the head to act right. Some of you have a lot of common sense while others are senseless. It’s up to you to help find ways for your Domina to communicate. This begins by you behaving yourself.

Your assignment for the next month is to be polite and respectful to ALL women. Say “Yes, Ma’am” and “No Ma’am”, “please”, etc. You know what to do. Do this with ALL women, even younger women. If you have a daughter do the same. Show respect and use good manners. The practice of this will help you become a better male.

The above was written by Goddess Dianna Vesta one of the great educators and entrepreneurs of Femdom. I don’t see any sign that she is active or has a website. But I may not have searched properly. Let me know.

Originally posted 2012-10-21 16:29:55.

Lifestyle Submissive Male Rules & Regulations

By Mistress Christianna

1. The submale must always practice traditional courtesy which men have shown Women in polite society, whether in private or public. Stand when She enters the room. Sit (or kneel) as soon as She is seated.

2. Be totally attentive: open doors, wait at table so that She begins eating first, always ask permission to leave Her presence.

3. The submale should never speak unless spoken to, or unless anticipating the needs of his Mistress.

4. The submissive will never sit with legs spread or slouch in a way typical of untrained males. Good posture and decorum is a sign of respect.

5. The submale will never stare at a Woman without Her permission. Unless the Woman seeks eye-contact, the submissive will keep his eyes lowered at all times.

6. When walking with his Mistress, or any Woman, the submissive will keep his gait in step with hers, which usually means taking smaller steps. The submale should always be at least a step behind; but not too far, because he must open all doors.

7. Respect is shown by a submissive as long as he never fails to forget his lowly role in life. The submissive must always be pleasant, never argue and never pout.

THE submale’s NAME

8. The submale should be given a new name by his Mistress to symbolize his submissive state. If the submale is a sissy, it should be a feminine name. Other names may be “made up” words that sound humiliating or which are amusing or pleasing to the Mistress; for example, names typical of pet dogs or cats.

THE submale’s BODY

9. A submale surrenders control to his Mistress. He surrenders control of his body, how he spends his time, how he dresses, what he eats, where he sleeps, the friends or acquaintances he is allowed to keep. In all aspects, the Mistress controls the submale.

10. Because a submale’s purpose is to please his Mistress, more than anything else She owns, he must learn to control his response to sexual stimulation for the greater enjoyment of his Mistress. his orgasm is the only that the submale has left to control for himself. Failure to control his orgasm is disobedience. Disobedience requires punishment.

11. If the Mistress prefers simply to torment the submale and deny him release, then the submale must control himself to provide Her than pleasure. He must dedicate himself to abstinence and thank his Mistress humbly for removing the pleasure of ejaculation, thus allowing him to dedicate his lost pleasure to Her.

12. If the Mistress demands satisfaction through sexual intercourse, the submale must be able to control effectively his own orgasm so that it is timed to the pleasure of his Mistress. His purpose is not to please himself but to please Her.

13. In all cases, the submale must remember that his orgasm does not belong to him — his orgasm belongs to his Mistress. It is Hers to use, however she sees fit.

14. The submale should be as clean-shaven as the Mistress requires: from the top of his head to his toes, body hair should be present only if the Mistress allows it.

15. The submale may wear long hair, styled to imitate the superior styles of Women, only if the Mistress permits.

16. The submale may never touch his own genitals without the permission of his Mistress. When washing, he must use a washcloth or brush, never his hands.

17. The submale will allow himself to be pierced or tattooed as required by his Mistress, if safely and professionally done.


18. The submale is the personal property of the Mistress. his possessions are Her possessions.

19. The submissive should always be saving to purchase “big ticket” items that his Mistress wants to buy. This means the submale is always on a strict allowance, kept by his Mistress.


20. Feminization is training in submission. Wearing items of Feminine attire separates the submissive from and puts him outside of the world of the macho male. Wearing feminine attire doesn’t make the male like a Woman; this is impossible.

21. Standard attire is pink or white panties, an extra-absorbent pad (normally used by those suffering from incontinence), and panty hose worn under male clothing.

22. Whether a woman knows what the submissive is wearing or not, feminization pushes the submissive closer to the company of women and away from the company of men. This is good for the submale, because it creates greater opportunities for him to be of help to Women, to serve them, and to model his behavior on their own superior behavior.

23. Feminine items can also be used as punishment — corsets, girdles and foundations. These should be selected by the Mistress for maximum discomfort.

24. If the submale is a sissy or TV, very feminine clothing should be reserved for rewards; drudge clothing — plain white panties, plain lingerie, housecoats, aprons, etc. — should be required as normal attire.

25. The submale should never buy his own clothing without the guidance of his Mistress. He should buy what pleases her, not what he likes.


26. The submissive will use only Feminine hygiene products: soaps, shampoos, lotions, deodorants, etc. and will be clean and properly groomed at all times.

27. The submale will submit to enemas, or self-administer enemas, on demand by the Mistress.

28. When urinating, the submale will always sit on the toilet; no exceptions.

29. For good health, the submissive will enroll in a dance aerobics class. As an alternative, the submale will prepare his own dance aerobics routine and perform it for his Mistress for Her amusement.

30. The submale must diet as required to maintain a correct weight for his height and should drink at least six 12-ounce glasses of water each day.

31. The submale must submit to eating only “submale food” selected by his Mistress whenever she requires it.


32. When a meal is over the submale must be quick to clear the table and wash the dishes.

33. The submale must always give his Mistress the first choice of everything — She picks the section of the paper to read first, the channel on TV to watch, the restaurant to go to, the movie to see, the friends to entertain, etc.

34. The submissive must always keep his own quarters spotless, as directed by the Mistress. All furnishings and interior decoration will follow Her taste.

35. The submale will perform all household chores for the Mistress, to include:

  • sweep and vacuum all floors and carpets
  • mop and was all floors
  • dust and polish all furniture
  • make the beds every day
  • wash and fold all clothing and linens
  • iron
  • handwash all lingerie
  • scrub bathrooms
  • clean kitchen
  • cook simple meals; assist in all cooking
  • wash dishes and put them away
  • set the table
  • shop for groceries and put them away
  • take out trash and sort recycled items
  • run all errands as directed
  • perform yard work; plant flowers as directed

Femdom Prayer

Male Slave’s Prayer to His Mistress

Femdom Prayer

Mistress is my Goddess, I shall obey
She leads me to fulfill Her will
She makes me understand my male inferiority

She accepts my submission
All that I do will be in Her divine name

Though I am unworthy
And can never be worthy
Mistress’ rod and whip will teach me
She teaches me my place with pain

Her perfection and flawlessness humble me
Her rules I will follow all of my life

Submit your F/m prayer.

Originally posted 2012-11-23 08:40:24.

Do Submissive Men Need a GuideBook?

Once I ran across a thread talking about the desirability of a handbook for submissive men.

When I outlined Rules for Voluntary Slaves I pretty much summed up everything I could think of.

Sure, it is a fairly generic list. But more specific strictures would have to be spelled out in terms of the two people and their relationship.

Relationships vary considerably: lifestyle 24/7, people who play with their life partners, female led relationships, those who engage in scenes with people met at fetish parties. And the individual mix of temperaments and fetishes there’s no way a rulebook could possibly fit most, much less all.

My list was just a specialized way of saying that a man who wants to submit to a woman needs to keep respect and courtesy at the front of his mind.

When some men write about their sense of woman worship and their hoped for relationship I find myself baffled some days.

I remember one guy writing that showing women respect was part of his contract. And read many who speak of treating women civilly as if it is some conversion they just underwent.

Were these guys hardcore sexist creeps in their earlier life? Women – other people in general – should be treated with courtesy and respect whenever possible. Those qualities are the oil that keeps society and social life running smoothly.

Of course respect would be interpreted as deference.

Being deferential seems a given in a relationship that includes power exchange. I’m not persuaded that it is a virtue when shown to women you don’t know (excluding obvious places like a fetish party if the rules of deportment are known).

And to subject a clerk at Starbucks with you humility is, well, I think a bit daft. Since she doesn’t have a context you are more likely to trouble her by seeming a creep than impressing her with qualities that are invisible and possibly unwelcome. Even many dominant women aren’t charmed to see the submissiveness turned on before there’ s been an introductory exchange and she expresses interest in your submission.

I’ll hazard a guess that if a man treats everyone with kindness and respect he’ll make a better impression on the dominant women he meets.

Once in a relationship if you feel you need the kind of guidance that a handbook would offer then it’d be a good idea to think of a contract for establishing the structure of the D/s part of your time together.

Romantic Submission

For me romantic love and submission are hopelessly intertwined, in fact I can safely say they are one and the same. That is not say I cannot enjoy a good whipping from a recently met acquaintance, but I believe that is more masochistic than submissive.

In that love, romantic or otherwise has an element of putting another’s likes, interests, satisfaction ahead of one’s own, of submerging one’s self, it is submissive. Generally love is not looked at and defined as submission. The emotional rituals of courting in a vanilla relationships are very similar to those establishing a D/s relationship.

However, in a vanilla relationship one doesn’t get all the wonderful kinky stuff. Too often people define D/s in terms of bondage, whips, chains and etc, but those are a fun expansion of one’s sex life. If dominance and submission were not a part of our emotional and psychological make up we would not have individuals who identify themselves as sub or domme.

My guess is if someone finds romantic love incompatible with submission, for him, at the current time, the two are incompatible. My problem is I’ve always found romantic love impossible without submission.

(Old newsgroup posting.)

Worship Empty Boots?

By bootlicker.

MKINYK … but the shoe or boot without the Domina’s foot in it just isn’t the same. It’s a matter of priorities and motivation, perhaps: one adores the Dominant Woman for Her Superior Self. Therefore, one adores the feet of the Woman because they are Her feet, and this worship shows that the sub, the slave, is lower than the lowest part of Her sacred person. Next step, one worships the boots on those precious feet, as a further abasement before Her divine presence. This represents a step lower and more distant from Her feet, to the protective coverings for them. “Fetish,” of course, means mentally substituting some object or process for the person whom you love or adore. So with retifism, or boot/shoe fetish, the brain transfers that love to Her boot. Our brains are crazy and they do weird things; that’s just one of them. But in this bootlicker’s foggy mind, it still has to be HER boot, ideally on Her foot, for it to be a valid shrine. Just any old shoe won’t do. Hair-splitting issue: Mistress tells Her slave to clean Her collection of 100 fetish boots in Her closet, whilst She is off doing whatever it pleases Her to do and ignoring Her devoted, selfless and long-suffering bootlicking slave boy. She’s not actually there, wearing the boots, but they are HER boots, and probably smell of Her foot-sweat, so that counts. But it is true that this “remote-control retifism” stretches the slave’s devotion. Or tests it. Or, maybe, gives the worm an opportunity to prove to Her and to itself how deep his devotion really goes, and to reassert (!) his wretched abasement.

Originally posted 2012-05-20 07:07:23.

Male Slave Warehouses


Male slaves are sometimes kept in warehouses.

When Mistress Owners go on business trips or vacations the slave may be kept in storage rather than accompany her. When a woman has decided to discard a slave she may prefer have it removed from her premises prior to sale to a new owner.

The fees for having slave men warehoused varies according to the quality of accommodation required. Valued slaves are kept in cells, allowed sunlight and better quality slave food. Inferior slaves or those with thrifty Mistress Owners are kept boxed in dark, tightly packed storage rooms. Tubing allows for nourishment and elimination.

Unclaimed slaves whose storage fees have lapsed are sold at auction. Good buys of slave property are sometimes to be had.

Male Slaves Bought & Sold in Bulk Lots

On this Gynarchic world the development of their internet proved a boom for the sales and acquisition of slaves in bulk. Male slaves of a very low order as mostly used for hard labor in agriculture. Aside for women looking for a specialized yard or stable cleaner they aren’t easily sold in individual units.

Farms and rancher can take a look at bulk lots of male slaves to add to their herds. Quick sale of low quality slaves save the vendor the expense of extended storage and feeding.


Male Slave’s Garbage Can Punishment


The ultimate punishment humiliation in this female supremacist society: a male slave spends a period as a human garbage receptacle.

Being a slave garbage can is extreme degradation. The slave ingests cigarette butts, plastic wrappers, wads of paper. Naturally there are sadists who enjoy shoving especially nasty and disgusting objects into the slave’s mouth.

There is a strict rule that nothing fatal or injurious is to be forced on a human trash can slave. Breaking this rule is a misdemeanor and results in a small fine.

Male Slave Caged for Public Punishment

Public Punishment of Slave Men


In many gynocratic, female supremacist societies the objectification of men is total. They aren’t even regarded as being of the same sex as the female. Men are not seen as human. From this stems the usage and treatment of male slaves disturbing to those living in more humane civilizations.

Erring male slaves are punished with public bondage of varying sort. Often the disciplined slave is left for the abuse of strangers. The idle or casual sadist is welcome to degrade or physically hurt the slave. The only limitation if maiming the slave. This would prevent the slave from future use.

The slave anticipatory fears often have more effect than the actually humiliations imposed on the wretched creature. Slaves rarely require further public punishment.