Comments on: Are You Searching for the Wrong Women?

By: nathanyl

nathanyl — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 22:56:04 +0000

Most of the women I have met in terms of BDSM play have been via the phone or internet so we get to chat a while and form some sort of bond before I get to see a photo. Luckily most of them were attractive anyway but for me the attitude is way more important than looks. It would be boring to have a really hot woman humiliating me who wasn’t really into it. I have a fairly broad concept of what attractive is, I tend to look at women on an indivudual basis rather than just saying “I don’t like fat chicks” as one overweight woman might be beautiful where as another it simply doesn’t look so good for eg. I’m not desperate to have any woman dominate me and I think it fair enough that some men have certain standards. At the same time though the standards have to be realistic.

By: G_a_t_o_s

G_a_t_o_s — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 17:43:15 +0000

We all have mental pictures of how The Woman is likely to look. But for my part if she can walk the walk the odds are very small that she will get turned down, at least for a date.

By: femsup

femsup — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 23:44:23 +0000

I was always taught that just going on looks was shallow.And since I’m a submissive it is doubly wrong and useless as what I really desire and want is a Womyn whose personality is dominant.
As people know their mothers always look the best to them not because they are the most physically beautiful in the world (an impossible thing as we all have our standards of beauty).What matters to the child is all the things he or She associates with the Mother they love that is embodied in their Mothers face and figure.If that Mother treats Her child well and sometimes even if She does not when the child sees that face it means security and love.
Anyway I rarely go for convetional beauty as this is usually synonymous with pandering to men and being submissive them.

By: Mule

Mule — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 17:38:34 +0000

I’m not looking for any woman. I already have all the woman I can handle; I have Mrs. Mule.

However, physical attractiveness has never been an issue with me. First of all, what I consider attractive and what publishers of fashion magazines or men’s magazines consider attractive are two different things.

Then there is the matter of extreme subjectivity. The more I like a woman, the better looking she gets. It is extremely difficult to see her objectively.

At the top of my list are the intangibles: Integrity, Confidence, Intelligence (not necessarily educated), Good Sense of humor (You need one to put up with me).

The first of the physical qualities I look for in a woman is her smile. I just can bring myself to feel negatively or even neutral towards a woman with a great smile.

Then there’s legs. A good set of gams are pleasant to look at. I’m lucky here; between right and left legs, Mrs. Mule has 6 feet of them.

By: roo-roo

roo-roo — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 21:01:01 +0000

I think lots of average, everyday, non-fetish-model-ish people are attractive and sexylicious. If someone is looking for a perfect physical specimen, that person had better be one himself/herself. Just because someone isn’t a Victoria’s Secret model or a Chippendale, that doesn’t mean they’re not attractive. I consider myself average-looking, so it’d be hypocritical of me (and futile) to seek nothing but supermodels.

But what if someone is a perfect 10 physically and has a nasty personality? That instantly drops the level of attraction. It’s not all about the physical, but I’d be lying if I said the physical isn’t important as well.

By: Sadiste

Sadiste — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 05:16:59 +0000

I’m on board with Dev. As someone who’s not a hardbody and who has only ever been called “cute,” I’m not going to pass muster for someone who wants an Angelina. (Daisy Duke legs? Not unless I could somehow swing a leg transplant.) So if you’re looking for the woman (read, “fetish model”) of your dreams, you have no shot with me and vice versa. Don’t get me wrong–I respect your right to desire whatever narrow range of appearance you choose; but that doesn’t mean that I’m going to respect *you* for the choice.

By: Dev

Dev — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 23:09:08 +0000

This is a tricky one. I feel judgmental towards people who, whether in vanilla or bdsm life, are only interested in conventionally attractive partners. Then again, I’m not conventionally attractive, so that’s my bias. I certainly think people have the right to whatever standards they choose. At the same time, if your standards cause you to be alone, well…yeah.